Writer's Block
Its official – I’m Stymied.
Thwarted.
Hindered.
Stuck.
My capacity to communicate in an expressive and creative way has currently dwindled.
Which in a sense is surprising given the many people, places, situations and emotions that are currently swirling through me like a raging hurricane; pulsing through me with such intensity that I can barely keep them all in, let alone giving up all attempts to equate logical rationale to any of them.
Yet, it is because of all of these varied, and at times, conflicting scenarios that I struggle to set them aside long enough to escape to my writings and my relaxation.
With embarrassment I confess that my last attempt at writing began with a shaky few paragraphs, some sketches, a few notes to self for future consideration and then degenerated quickly into a to-do list in a feeble attempt to clear my mind.
The last time my brain was trying in vain to sort through so much stuff at once, I found the only thing that truly worked was to be held by another for an extended period of time. Not sexually – it doesn’t even have to be romantically – I just need the comfort and security of knowing that even if the rest of the world crumbles before my feet, that someone in the world still cares enough to be there.
Thwarted.
Hindered.
Stuck.
My capacity to communicate in an expressive and creative way has currently dwindled.
Which in a sense is surprising given the many people, places, situations and emotions that are currently swirling through me like a raging hurricane; pulsing through me with such intensity that I can barely keep them all in, let alone giving up all attempts to equate logical rationale to any of them.
Yet, it is because of all of these varied, and at times, conflicting scenarios that I struggle to set them aside long enough to escape to my writings and my relaxation.
With embarrassment I confess that my last attempt at writing began with a shaky few paragraphs, some sketches, a few notes to self for future consideration and then degenerated quickly into a to-do list in a feeble attempt to clear my mind.
The last time my brain was trying in vain to sort through so much stuff at once, I found the only thing that truly worked was to be held by another for an extended period of time. Not sexually – it doesn’t even have to be romantically – I just need the comfort and security of knowing that even if the rest of the world crumbles before my feet, that someone in the world still cares enough to be there.
Copyrighted by Okami 7:25 AM
19 Comments:
c'mere you..... i know how you feel.
and btw, them's pretty big fancy words fer someone who is making claims they can't write. (different capacity i guess...)
If you just want to be held, go to a comic convention or anime expo. From there you just need to find some poor lonely bastard who smells like he hasn't showered for a week dressed up like Sailor Moon holding a sign that says "Free Hugs". They're out there. I have seen it. I don't think I shall ever feel clean again.
Like messiah, I find it odd that you're claiming to be suffering from writer' block when you've written such a post. The vocabulary and relative length suggest that you are A) lying or 2) on a different writing level than me. I'm thinking it's the latter. Lately, when I can't think of anything to write, I've just been turning to YouTube and looking for Jonathan Coulton stuff.
Agreed with the people above. Your writers block is a lot more fluent and entertaining than my own. I hope you do find someone to be close to in this moment, though.
To Doug's point, Sci-Fi conventions would probably work equally well.
And why are people always Stymied? Why aren't they Spanky-ed, Alfalfa-d, or Buckwheat-ed?
That's a little "Little Rascals" humor for you.
Messiah: it has little to do with capacity - more to do with a lack of any other way to describe it. My world isn't nose-diving exactly, but there are numerous factors which are beginning to take a physical, mental and emotional toll and I'm beginning to wonder that if I don't do something about them in the near future, that it is going to erode my soul.
Doug: UGH! Only you dear man would try to replace isolation and frustration with repulsion. Ew.Ew.Ew.
:P
I'm just struggling to make sense of things...
Princess: Thanks - I find that during times like this it is incredibly hard to be an only child and not currently in a relationship; you don't have anyone to turn to when you need someone the most.
Joe: Spanky-ed?
I like it - for all the wrong reasons.
Somehow though, the thought of venturing into a convention of such origin scares me considerably :P
Writing about writers block.
How pleasingly inherently ironic.
*hug*
Seems to be a few of these blog posts going on just now - you'll find a way out of it, I'm sure...
PS "Not even romantically": I'd describe someone just being there while the world crumbles around you as being romantic? Like "love" it's a strange word that I find means many different things to many people...
Which in a sense is surprising given the many people, places, situations and emotions that are currently swirling through me like a raging hurricane
That's kind of why it isn't surprising. You can't get everything out at once, and that's the block. Just start writing, don't try to have a destination, just find a thread and pick it up. The end will reveal itself, if not that day, then on the next or whenever you revise it. Revision isn't fixing, so much as discovering what a story really means and where it's heading toward. Even just writing a post, this is the way to go.
And it's not my advice, it's Raymond Carver's writing advice. I'm just regurgitating it. But it sounds damn good.
Just my two cents. I hope it works.
Ultra: Thanks, I think. I equate it to such things as "musing about muses"...
:)
Ant: Aww – thanks.
I re-read my post after some of the comments began to appear, and I realized that I inadvertently made it sound as though my world IS crashing down.
This is not the case.
It can be more closely described as the sensation and experience of sitting in row 10 floor seats to a live Aerosmith concert while trying to carry on conversations with 15 other people who surround you, all talking at once in a feeble attempt to be heard over the music and one another.
In short – too much noise. I struggle to make sense of anything going on right now, from the mundane to the magnificent and all points in between.
As for your footnote – poignant observation indeed, and remarkably apt.
Thanks for that. :)
Eric: Thanks for the tip - as soon as I can find a few free minutes to myself I'll give it a try!
Why are people talkign at an Aerosmith gig?
Heathens
They're wondering why the dude looks like a lady, and saying "I say old bean, that fella looks like a bit of crumpet, wouldn't you say wot wot?"
Or maybe they're saying: "Well when I am with those friends of mine - you know, the black fellows - we tend to perambulate in this manner..."
Ultra: Indeed - albeit I still couldn't hear anything for two days after that - what a show!
But it is a fairly accurate comparison to my current headstate. :)
Ant: HA!
:P
Somehow I can't help but think that the gyrations of Steven Tyler would be significantly lessened if the lyrical construct was overhauled to such a degree...
hee hee...bit of a crumpet indeed...
Oh, and I got round to Neko Case.
Very good.
Watched a Letterman performance on YouTube
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