Starlight, Starbright...oh who am I kidding?

Alright, I have to admit that yes, yesterday was my birthday. I thought I could get away with little fanfare, but thanks to LMizzle and Blondie, such was not to be the case. (Thanks ladies).

So I decided to see what the "stars" had in store for me, just because your birthday is the one day of the year where you get two horoscopes to giggle at. So I went in search of what I thought would provide me with ample material for a giggle-worthy post; with mixed results.

For example, the first one I came across told me to:

Forget about everything that has gone before, because none of it matters.

Instead of looking back and lamenting what might have been, look at where you are now and imagine where you would like to be a year or ten years into the future. You still have a lifetime in front of you, so start that new and improved you today.

The new and improved me? As opposed to the old and haggard me? Ew ~ I am a little ashamed to admit that this may have merit. I don't feel old, but haggard on the other hand...that feeling is a tad familiar. I choose to believe its merely the sleep deprevation, but the only haggard I can be bothered to discuss is Merle...and even that is limited at best.

Onwards I searched for other fragmented quips and insights:

ARIES (March 21 - April 20): The more someone tries to scare you into doing something you don't want to do the more you must dig in your heels and refuse to play ball. They don't seem to realize you are not the sort who can be bullied but if you get the chance to show them you won't hesitate to do so - and if it annoys them, so much the better.

Wow ~ I now have a 'stellar' excuse to be a cad. Bloody Brilliant. (Sorry about the pun). Of course, digging in my heels is remarkably easy when you have 51/2" spikes with which to do so.

From there, things took a turn for the more abstract. Case in point:

On certain days, toast slips through your fingers and lands butter-side down. Other times, all you need to do is think about toast and someone offers you a slice. Reach out for what you want this year. It will land in your plate.

Um ~ you bet I will? I mean who needs life to be like a box of chocolates when it can be...um..like slippery toast? Does that mean that "butter me up" will mean something completely different now? Perhaps for the next 12 months, whenever I have a bad day, I'll just tell people I can't believe it's not butter. *groan* Even I can't believe I just said that...

And then this little diddy was what I need to be pushed right off the ever-lovin' edge.

It's not a time for acting meek - go boldly after what you seek.
Your mood may govern how you act, or what would get you to react.
Daydreams may now give you clues to good ideas that you can use.
Love may come now by surprise, yet not for the type you idealize.

This silly crap can't get much worse - this loser gets paid to write in verse.
His insight leaves me feeling queasy, for writing this drivel is mind-numbingly easy.
I feel rather sorry for this lyrical prose, but it is still a horoscope I suppose.
I can never complain about life on my blog, for how bad is his life when this is his job?

Happy Birthday: You will be walking a very fine line this year. If you take one route, you are likely to make financial gains but if you take the other, you will benefit from life lessons that will bring about spiritual growth and awareness. Questioning your inner strength and acting on your gut feelings will lead you in the right direction.

Oh fun: so I can have lonely money, or be an enlightened hobo. Splendid. Question my inner what now? Looky here, the only strength I currently possess can be found under the heel of my foot. And how does one decide exactly the difference between a gut feeling and indigestion? I mean, I would hate to find out that the life-altering decisions that I reach are based, in part, on having a spicy lunch.

And lastly:

Birthday Baby: You are a free thinker. You have a creative edge and an ability to turn ideas into something concrete. You take the initiative and are willing to step out on a limb for anything or anyone you believe in.

What can I say? I just liked this one...

So to everyone who wished me a Happy Birthday, I thank you all for your kindness. And a special thank-you to Lmizzle for not only the special "Birthday Blog" tribute, but for the super shiny present too. (Love them!)

Ah...another year older...now I just have to work on the "wiser" part.